Mood: 6 out of 10 – I am feeling vaguely optimistic today. I am psyching myself up to grab Recovery by the bollocks and start my new life. But it is too early to accurately note my mood; as always, it is subject to dramatic change.



WatchingThe History Boys (film, adapted by Alan Bennett from his play of the same name) (2006), dir. Nicholas Hytner.

Listening toCold Fact by Sixto Rodriguez (1970)

Drinking: cold coffee – it remains uncertain as to whether I will drink alcohol today. I hope I don’t. I want a drink and I don’t want a drink. And so the battle wages on…

Eating: a Kit-Kat and an apple.

Smoking: JPS silver.

Buying: tickets for the Alexander McQueen Savage Beauty exhibition at the V&A. To say I am excited would be an understatement. I love Lee McQ for so many reasons – I am fascinated by his life and his character, by his mind, by his death, by his legacy. And I totally adore his work, and have done since the iconic skull-print scarf – I can only dream of the day that I wear a piece by Alexander McQueen. He is a genius.


Pre-ordering: The new St Tropez In Shower Lotion 200ml. After spending half the year looking like a vampire, I like to look healthy in the summer and enjoy having a tan. But my skin is really sensitive and looking sunkissed is definitely not worth damaging your skin irreparably or contracting skin cancer, so I am continuing to follow my suntan mantra: Bottle is best. High SPF + St Tropez fake tan = happy skin.

Trying: to stay awake, stop procrastinating and get on with my day!

Giving: thought to volunteering at the Oxfam bookshop in Muswell Hill, or the Red Cross bookshop in Palmers Green – but I’m not sure if I’m mentally well enough right now.

Worrying: about going back to sleeping on the floor – sleep is so important to my wellbeing, and I shall miss not having a bed or my own personal space. I am nervous about my housing situation in general, as usual.

Dreaming: of moving to Paris – my health and my father’s health permitting, I plan to be living in Paris by this time next year.

Loving: you, always.

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